So, of course everyone knows that I have been having technical troubles since Sunday evening. Thank God that problem may just be over. I’ll know for sure by tonight.
I spent hours upon hours trying to get things fixed and situated. The screaming, crying and utter frustration with the issue shook me in a way I did not expect. I mean, we all have set backs when making goals, but I think it’s the level of determination that caused my inner being to stagger.
For so long I have fought with the demon of fear. The fear of success mixed with a fear of failure has always crippled me to the point of zero results. No matter how many ideas I have written in notebooks and stored on the hard drive of my netbook, I could not seem to execute what I wanted.
I know you may be wondering, what does one have to do with the other? Well, let me explain.
It took a lot of courage and hard work to get my series and the such mapped out. It took some soul-searching, as well as some hard advice from friends and family. But I sucked up my fear and was ready to pounce.
Everything came crashing down. My technical problem wouldn’t allow me to share the projects I had worked on for so long. I approached the problem with conviction and it only got bigger. It didn’t help that no one else could see the problem from where they were. It was strictly coming from my computer. And I had worked so hard.
This one problem started a ripple effect on me. I started to doubt that writing would ever be a success for me, even though I love it beyond any word I could ever express. I started to then panic because all my other responsibilities were coming at me like a high-speed chase. It even went as far as shaking my faith.
Some may think, “All that for a technical issue”? Yep. The technical issue wasn’t the actual problem. It was just the rock that was thrown in the pond. Even the tiniest pebble can make ripples that span a lake. This small problem was enough to bring out things I had been questioning for years.
From this problem I’ve learned some things and have come up with solutions:
- Learn the ins and outs of a site so that you can troubleshoot the best way you can.
- Tech support is your friend (Me and the tech guy are like besties now that we’ve talked so much.)
- Every setback does NOT mean failure. It just means you have to find a new route. You may just have missed a turn somewhere.
- Pulling at your hair while frustrated is NOT a good thing. (I almost lost one of my locks. 😀 )
- When you get fustrated do NOT use anyone in a 10 block radius as verbal target practice. You may hurt some feelings that way.
- There’s nothing wrong with plan A, but make sure plan B, C and D are waiting if needed. Having a back up plan to the back up plan to the plan is a WONDERFUL thing.
- Allah (God) never gives you more than you can bear. (Hence why my problem is reducing) Breathe and relax.
- Something I need not ever forget again: Every cloud has a silver lining and after every storm there is a rainbow.
- Having a meltdown helps only one thing; it helps you admit defeat. Take a break and come back to things.
- Mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it shouldn’t matter. Think: things could always be worse.
Now that I have said all that I am utterly refreshed.
A real writer writes and doesn’t just talk about writing, so that is what I am headed to do. I am so happy I can now focus on what matters instead of staring at internet codes and updates all day.
Thank you for all your patience. We should be back to our regular scheduled program as soon as this evening.
Peace & Blessings